(Article Taken from somewhere)
Lalit Modi has defended the non-selection of Pakistani players by calling the move an 'ego boost'. None of the players from the world champion Pakistan were given a contract by IPL. "One must understand our stance", said Modi to a swarm of journalists. "Why does a Pakistani get to hit the winning runs of an Indian tournament and be the highest wicket taker as well?".
Sohail Tanvir, the Pakistan allrounder, won the purple cap in the inaugural IPL and hit the winning run off the last ball of the final to give Rajasthan Royals the title. Another Pakistani Kamran Akmal was also a part of the victorious Rajasthan Royals as the wicketkeeper-batsman.
"They're the world champions. They have the best strikers, the best pacemen and the best spinners in this format.", continued Modi. "Thats not good for us. How will Indians win the orange, purple and pink caps then? Eliminating Pakistani players from IPL was our only hope. Their win/loss ratio in T20 internationals is so good its ridiculous. They're the world champions. And now we should allow them to own us in our own domestic tournament? I dont think so."
Modi felt not only Pakistanis were battering Indian cricketers, they were also becoming bigger crowd attractions even in India. "The way the Indian crowd cheered for Shoaib Akhtar during his long run-up of a spectacular spell in the first IPL, I've never ever seen Indian crowd cheer for any Indian bowler. Even though we've had some great expess bowlers like Zaheer, Pathan, Agarkar, Nehra and others. Ok I admit they're mediocre trundlers, but how can we let them feel inferior by allowing the real cricket talent that is Pakistan players to play with them and take the spotlight?"
But Modi's claim of inferiority complex didn't just stop with cricket; "We have applied tons of fairing creams, myself included, which is the most profitable product in India. But Pakistanis have been consistently better looking than us. In addition, they make fun of our sizes."
Shilpa Shetty, the owner of Rajasthan Royals and an underachieving Bollywood actress, echoed the inferior IPL commissioner. "Why should we bid for Afridi who did not even have to go through plastic surgeries like me to look that good. And what do I get for the money I spent? I still get laughed at in reality shows by average looking white women." Shilpa Shetty was pwned in a trashy British reality show nobody watches, by an equally trashy white woman. "Besides we have a good spinner in Irfan Pathan and hopefully he will spin the ball this time".
Shetty and Modi have further agreed to sing songs in the middle of the field, with a hundred backup dancers, after every 5 overs of the matches. The songs will feature lyrics describing the match situation of the last 5 overs, clearly naming the heroes and the villains in a given scenario. Famous Bollywood lyricists will work with expert cricket commentators such as Sir Arun Lal to come up with the lyrics on the spot.